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Him wrote:
I think only in the most extreme and obvious of cases should it even be considered, but in most cases I'm very much against it.

How do you decide if a child is being abused?


YOU don't, all you need to do is alert someone who can find out if they are.
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rover49 wrote:
YOU don't, all you need to do is alert someone who can find out if they are.


All you need to do is alert the Paedofinder General

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XCywGhHQMEw
rover49 wrote:
YOU don't, all you need to do is alert someone who can find out if they are.


All you need to do is alert the Paedofinder General

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XCywGhHQMEw
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rover49 wrote:
YOU don't, all you need to do is alert someone who can find out if they are.

Who? The Police? And I don't mean the band. It's an incredibly serious allegation/suspicion to raise that can lead to all sorts of problems for the family. Social services visits etc would they be nervous of taking their child to a doctor/hospital in the near future?

Raising a suspicion is pretty much the same as an allegation and would lead to the same consequences. How can teachers, sports coaches etc be in a position to judge in most cases when even experienced social workers don't spot cases?

I agree with everything DaveO says in his post.
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Him wrote:
Who? The Police? And I don't mean the band. It's an incredibly serious allegation/suspicion to raise that can lead to all sorts of problems for the family. Social services visits etc would they be nervous of taking their child to a doctor/hospital in the near future?

Raising a suspicion is pretty much the same as an allegation and would lead to the same consequences. How can teachers, sports coaches etc be in a position to judge in most cases when even experienced social workers don't spot cases?

I agree with everything DaveO says in his post.


If I suspected abuse, I would alert the police or social services, no question.
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rover49 wrote:
If I suspected abuse, I would alert the police or social services, no question.


I am sure you would but that isn't the problem.

The problem is abuse occurred but someone will say you suspected or even knew of it and didn't report it.

The case here:

http://www.theguardian.com/society/2013/sep/17/professionals-failed-report-daniel-pelka

is shocking but the report is written with hindsight. The teachers locked away other children's lunch boxes as the poor kid was stealing food. Does this mean in future any teacher who sees a kid steal food off another child must suspect the child is being starved?

I don't see how teachers could function in such an environment where behaviour or some medical condition has them running to send a report for fear of prosecution.

We have to hope teachers would spot it but sometimes they won't for all manner of reasons but with negligence not being one.
rover49 wrote:
If I suspected abuse, I would alert the police or social services, no question.


I am sure you would but that isn't the problem.

The problem is abuse occurred but someone will say you suspected or even knew of it and didn't report it.

The case here:

http://www.theguardian.com/society/2013/sep/17/professionals-failed-report-daniel-pelka

is shocking but the report is written with hindsight. The teachers locked away other children's lunch boxes as the poor kid was stealing food. Does this mean in future any teacher who sees a kid steal food off another child must suspect the child is being starved?

I don't see how teachers could function in such an environment where behaviour or some medical condition has them running to send a report for fear of prosecution.

We have to hope teachers would spot it but sometimes they won't for all manner of reasons but with negligence not being one.
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A case I know of personally brings to mind the point that if, say, parents do not realise that a child is being abused by a relative or close family acquaintance, will it be assumed that that cannot possibly have really been the case?
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Horrible stuff.

Just to show this sort of thing isn't new, have a read of Uncle Ernest by Alan Sillitoe. Great short story, especially because he really subverted the whole paranoia issue by making the main character the victim - albeit willing.
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I'd better not let my wife read that or she'd have a heart attack. As many on here know our youngest son is Autistic. He is now 16 and the future as an adult is the biggest concern for all parents of children in his position.

Mind you given financial support is an easy target for cuts and there is still such ignorance about the condition I have little hope we won't see things get worse not better.

I'll give you an example of the ignorance. Here in Cheshire there is "consultation document" out about transport for Autistic kids aged 16 and over to their special schools which are not of course on the doorstep. It's an hours journey for our son in a taxi shared by five other kids and a carer. In short they want the parents to start paying for it at a cost of £1200 a year.

Now one of the alternatives they put in the "consultation document" is the so called desire to encourage independent travel. What this means is if the child can be accompanied to a bus stop the idea is they can go to school on the bus.

This is idiotic. It will expose to kids to potential abuse on the journey. Some can easily be led astray as they are vulnerable in that way. What if the bus breaks down or is in an accident? What happens at the other end? Is the school going to have to have staff waiting for various buses as they arrive from various locations? Are there any direct services (no is the answer) so how do the kids cope changing buses? Even if they could is it practical to even consider the journey by bus?

We are of course gearing up for a fight against this but it wares you out. Anyway it's that stupid independent travel idea just shows how ignorant some people are of the issues and it's no wonder problems arise.


I'd better not let my wife read that or she'd have a heart attack. As many on here know our youngest son is Autistic. He is now 16 and the future as an adult is the biggest concern for all parents of children in his position.

Mind you given financial support is an easy target for cuts and there is still such ignorance about the condition I have little hope we won't see things get worse not better.

I'll give you an example of the ignorance. Here in Cheshire there is "consultation document" out about transport for Autistic kids aged 16 and over to their special schools which are not of course on the doorstep. It's an hours journey for our son in a taxi shared by five other kids and a carer. In short they want the parents to start paying for it at a cost of £1200 a year.

Now one of the alternatives they put in the "consultation document" is the so called desire to encourage independent travel. What this means is if the child can be accompanied to a bus stop the idea is they can go to school on the bus.

This is idiotic. It will expose to kids to potential abuse on the journey. Some can easily be led astray as they are vulnerable in that way. What if the bus breaks down or is in an accident? What happens at the other end? Is the school going to have to have staff waiting for various buses as they arrive from various locations? Are there any direct services (no is the answer) so how do the kids cope changing buses? Even if they could is it practical to even consider the journey by bus?

We are of course gearing up for a fight against this but it wares you out. Anyway it's that stupid independent travel idea just shows how ignorant some people are of the issues and it's no wonder problems arise.
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